Finally a finger on my door bell

A slender index pad,

nail painted crimson red

Pressed my door bell,

kept pressed for a time spell

Thumb stretched out right,

rest fingers folded tight

a sober ring, on ring finger,

little late but I answered d’ door

 Right now who could be there?

stunned, startled, not sure

Hypnotized, pulled a step back,

two slim arms,

promptly encircled my neck

A deep desire to get lost in me,

an eager river jumped in to d’ sea

Spellbound, I had no words to tell,

couldn't digest, yet a reality,

finally a finger on my door bell

Average guys judge me ordinary,

I’m unique, her remarks do vary

She keenly observes my act,

explores each uttered word

My eloquent words carry weight,

mighty weapon, won’t go waste

She disapproves my silence

prefers my garrulousness

My days must go with a flow,

music only makes me glow

Passion keeps me younger,

busy, enthusiastic for ever

Why days nights appear longer

same campus, close by, yet so far

Queries in her mind hard to solve

Can it be an unconditional love!

I told my wish to be a singer,

and to move world over

On a singing mission,

sat next to me, calmly listened

I wanted her to accompany,

to be part of music symphony

She gazed at me, kept quiet,

not much inclined to it

Her words didn’t reach my ear drums,

I focused in murmuring my songs

But songs revolving around her,

met an abrupt end,

since then I ignored my friend

Everything turned upside down,

no wish to be treated as a clown

no more sharing of dreams, hopes,

things at a standstill, a full stop

Each passing day, she got restless,

missed me in my absence

Tried to walk at a fast pace,

to match my quick steps

I may miss an event, if apprehends

feels perturbed, turns tense

If ever feels I’m upset,

convinces me in a whispering voice

Looks away, not to meet my eyes,

a distance of decency she keeps

from far, my moves she locates

often reminds me,

of her brother’s bounty biceps

 Her unexpected arrival,

a happy accident

can’t be rude to her,

can’t be indecent

Dormant songs got energized,

vocal cords oscillated rhythm wise

it’ll be a thrill, an amusement,

on stage to feel  her nearness

garland of her arms,
 I did accept,

steadily my hands,
  slid to her waist

I felt my endeavors,
 will never fail,

coz’  
finally a finger on my door bell

You're just a coward

D’ pretty girl in her blue dress,

a smile of contentment,

a glowing face,

Next to her, a brilliant boy,

fair, tall, a handsome guy

A perfect moment of happiness

captured in d’ photo, in details

at d' bottom,
a hand written sermon 
 “ Its for U to see,

of course me and my He”

D' sealed envelope sent
to my address,

handed over by dad a week back

Drugs dripping to perfusion port,

tunneled in my chest,

Hands free to undo d’ envelope,

to pull out its content,

a brief recoup from lethargy,

can unveil d’ suspense

A  truly mesmerizing snap,

attire casual , guys full in grace

Dazzling eyes appear dreamy,

Smiles of satire!, 
yet it pleased me

I could see in flash back,

events occurred at a fast pace

She came to meet my parents,

to impress about her obedience

Docile, fit to be my life partner,

all ups-downs willing to share

A perfect professional match,

can walk far,

 her hand in my hand

But now,

an unknown her life partner,

and me, d’ most favored,

absolutely a stranger

 Tides of tear tough to check,

tend to trickle down my cheek

Once earnestly eager,
 to be my wife,

But I had to shut her,
 out of my life

Didn’t wish her to watch me,

 devoured by d’ disease
she should not be a witness, 
to horrors of life, events of distress
I know my fate, my prognosis

why to drag an innocent in to it

Her shrunken face, I can't bear,
her glowing eyes shading tear

All her whys, hows didn’t listen,

closed chapters of our love scene

Our sweet bond ought to expire,
hurting hard, 
yet its my honest desire

Lymphoma won’t sanction pity,

chemo may not add to longevity

Uncertain life, then be a burden,

why she to suffer for no reason
She's special for me,

 my unique pal,

for ever she'll remain special
Its evidently my compulsion,
to push her out of my life,
the only option 

Chemo started early in d' morning,

last drop to be over by evening

Mom lovingly stroke my hair,

u behaved  a brave heart so far
But what's that in your hand?,
photo of a newly wedded friend

That day,
she was utterly surprised,

in profound shock,

so, all these days I fooled her,

in d’ name of love!

Didn’t wish to leave my house

in spite of d’ insult

waiting outside, standing

till my doors were shut

Her silence spoke,

louder than her words

“U ignored my true love,

you are just a coward”